It is very bittersweet to know that today was our last day in Indiana. A new chapter of our lives will begin in San Diego.

I have shed many tears saying goodbye to many sisters, brothers, and dear friends. We have had an unbelievable journey here and will miss each and every one of you who have touched our lives, taught us, shared with us, laughed with us, cried with us, encouraged us, helped us grow, and prayed for us.

We have made lifelong friends, experienced horrible loss, unexpected illnesses, and wonderful spiritual progress. If I could speak with the Günes who was planning the big move here exactly 4 years ago from Germany, completely oblivious to all the heartache and laughter that was awaiting her, I would tell her not to fear anything and that God had already planned all the wonderful people who would touch her life and her heart.

I will not say goodbye to all the wonderful friends in Lafayette. Instead, I will say thank you for having been part of my journey and my life.

And if you are ever in the San Diego area, let me know… I would love to see you and have coffee… California style!

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OK, I realize it’s been a while since Rupie has been in the news, but I still had to write this blog article even with the time lapse. I know, shame on me for neglecting my blog on vacation. (Tsk Tsk Tsk).

Back to Rupie. What I’m not going to talk about are the eavesdropping acts. That has been covered very well in the blogosphere with much colorful language than I would have dared use (always thinking of that personal brand…). Instead what I want to talk about is how his billions and his countless business transactions failed to teach him one simple lesson: Taking responsibility for the actions of his underlings.

Did you see how he just threw all the blame on his managers during the congressional hearings? The man just threw all his direct reports under the bus! And not only did he so ungracefully shift all the blame to his underlings – the ones that were under his leadership – but he also publicly threatened that they would be disciplined internally.

Lessons for you dear reader?

• When your team makes a mistake (and they will), blaming them just to clear your name makes you look petty, like a bad leader, makes you childish, and still doesn’t clear your name. You are the leader – it’s your responsibility!
• Apparently being a successful businessman doesn’t mean you are a good/responsible leader.
• No amount of money or power can shield your personal brand from tarnish.

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Yikes. Suddenly, you start automatically polluting your friend’s newsfeed and walls with R-rated links and other videos… that are really just bait to get people to click on them so that their account gets infected and so on and so forth.

Here is what to do:

1) Don’t panic.

2) Delete all of the infected posts. When you hover over them, an x will appear on the right side. Although the screenshot below is not of an infected post, it shows you how to delete unwanted stuff off your wall.

How To Delete A Post Off Your Facebook Wall

3) It’s time to clean up some of those apps, games, quizes, and other things that you have given access to.  While some are harmless time-wasters, with others, well, you never know who is behind the app and what their true intentions are.  So unless you really really want that quiz that tells you which Sex & The City character you’re most like, remove the unnecessary apps. Here’s how in pictures – what can I say, I’m a marketer. I’m a visual person.

3a) Under Account Tab (Upper Right Hand Corner Of Facebook), Click Privacy Settings

Under Account Tab (Upper Right Hand Corner Of Facebook), Click Privacy Settings

3b) In the next screen that appears, Click on Edit Your Settings Apps & Websites (Lower Left Corner)

Click Edit Settings On Lower Left Corner

3C) You’ll see a list of apps that you have allowed access to your Facebook profile along with the date of when you gave the permission.

List of Apps That Have Access To Your Facebook Profile

3D) Click on the x next to the app to remove it completely. Confirm in the box that pops up.

Removing Unwanted Apps From Facebook Profile

3E) If you would rather not delete an app completely, you can alternately see how much access it has and edit those settings as seen below.

Editing Settings On Apps For Facebook

4) Now that you have removed the pesky links and posts and cleaned up your apps, it’s time to change the password to your profile. You can do that via the Account Tab on the upper right hand corner and then clicking Change in the Password row in the window that shows up.

Where To Change Facebook Profile Password

5) It wouldn’t hurt if you cleared all cookies, browsing history, etc. also. Also update your malware / antivirus programs.

At the time of writing this blog, some of the popular scams that spread Facebook virus/malware include things like click here to:

• See what you’ll look like in 50 years
• See who has clicked on your profile
• Get free facebook credit
• Get a free iPad2
• Videos about beachbabes
• “This teen killed herself after her dad posted this video”
• “I saw this video and I think it’s you”

Have you had to clean out your account before? As malware and viruses continue to get more sophisticated, keep in mind that to stay safe:

1) Don’t click on suspicious links

2) Don’t allow useless apps to have access to your account

3) Change your password regularly and use a strong password

4) Keep your computer’s antivirus program up to date

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photo © 2010 Martin Abegglen | more info (via: Wylio)

I received another email today asking if someone could take me out to coffee to “pick my brain”. What makes people think my time is only worth a $3 coffee? Would they ever call a lawyer and say “I don’t want to pay you for a consultation so if we do it under the pretense of coffee, I can get away with a $3 investment. What day are you free?”

I love helping business owners – I hold free seminars as fundraisers, I blog, I post on my Facebook fanpage, I post on Twitter, I answer questions via email, I answer questions on LinkedIn, I send out educational newsletters, I have pro bono projects, I donate services to charity auctions – yet it’s somehow not enough for some. And how fair is the $3 coffee fee to all my other clients who pay my full fees?

I also want to make clear, I am not talking about my strategic partners or certain projects/charities that ask for my help – these I help with great joy.

Did I also mention I invest a lot of time and money in gaining my knowledge? I read countless business and marketing books. I subscribe to many many blogs. I attend seminars. I watch webinars. I research. I skype with other professionals in my field. And I put time into creating a process that works in helping businesses achieve success with their marketing.

Can you tell I’m frustrated? To all the other consultants and service providers out there – how do you deal with this issue? I would love some advice please.

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photo © 2010 Steven Depolo | more info (via: Wylio)Dear people who don’t understand diabetes: Please don’t tell us you would never ever be able to give yourself a shot. Please don’t tell us you could never give up your sweets because you love your chocolate too much. You do realize that being diabetic is not a choice right? Please don’t tell us that you knew so and so who died of diabetes. As Ginger Vieira pointed out in her Vlog: Would you ever say these things to a cancer patient? “Oh, you got diagnosed with cancer? Ugh, I could never go through chemo, I don’t know how you do it. And you know my neighbor’s brother died of cancer.” Yeah, very motivating! What do you want me to do with that information?? And I’m not even going to talk about “Oh you must have eaten too much sugar as a kid!” That’s irrelevant (!) – and even if it were true, I’m sure you would say to a cancer patient “Oh, now you wish you had eaten your green veggies and a balanced diet right?”

We may look OK on the outside, but on the inside, we are dealing with so many fears (kidney failure, blindness, amputations, heart disease…) and horrible physical side effects that you just can’t see on the outside yet.

Diabetes is an around-the-clock disease. I test first thing in the a.m. while still in bed. I test in the middle of the night to make sure I’m not too low. I test during exercise. I test after exercise. I test before meals. After meals. I leave business meetings to test if I’m dizzy. I stop seminars to test if I’m not feeling well. When my husband calls me, he doesn’t ask how my day is going, he asks me how my sugar level is first.

I get dizzy after I eat so meetings are scheduled accordingly. I get hot, shaky, and lose the ability to think for myself when my sugar falls too low to 30. I get sleepy, tired, dizzy, and sick if I can’t control my sugar after I eat and miscalculate the carbs. Going out to eat? Not so often. Craving pizza? That’s too bad because the side-effects will be too much to handle for me so I just forego it. Craving sweets? See the previous sentence.

Oh and exercising is so much fun too with diabetes! Most diabetics have to test often during exercise to make sure they don’t undersugar and pass out. Yey! Some (like me), throw their bodies into different shock with exercise. My sugar levels double from 100 to 200 within 10 minutes of exercising and get ketones. That feeling is always fun. And then trying to push myself through it while my body and legs feel like led and I feel like I might pass out any minute – Yey again. And then stop, test, take a shot, push self to run more, stop, test, take a shot… while the entire time fearing what is happening to your heart and kidneys at that moment and whether the damage will be huge or just “small” this time. What is the alternative? What other choice do I have?

And the first time I gave myself a shot? It took 45 minutes. I cried and screamed so much I couldn’t see the needle. Now I can give myself a shot in 2 seconds. Nearly 4,000 sharp needles being jabbed into your skin in one year will speed things up.  Did you know diabetes kills more people than AIDS and breast cancer combined. So you don’t think you can ever do it? You would be amazed at what you learn to do when your life depends on it. While I hope you will never have to learn to deal with it, research shows that 1 in 3 children born since the year 2000 will develop diabetes. And there are tens of millions of people already diagnosed with it in USA alone. So my news to you is: You probably already know someone with the disease. Educate yourself on it. And when you talk to us about our disease, feel free to ask thoughtful questions – and please do so without judging.

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I want this to be a wake up call for the business owners out there who blame the economy, the community, the employees, the customers (yes! The customers!). Stop making excuses! TAKE OWNERSHIP! It is your business – if you aren’t going to step up, lead it, and to turn it around, do you really think it is going to run itself successfully? In working with numerous clients, companies, and teams in United States, Asia, and Europe – here are the mistakes I saw managers of all backgrounds make and what you should do to make you more successful at your job and as a leader:

1) Take ownership. Take responsibility. It’s time!

2) Stop making excuses. While they may make you feel better because you are shifting blame from yourself, they make you look weak, unprofessional, undependable, and cause you to resist professional and financial growth.

3) Quit blaming other people for your mistakes and failures.

4) When you get customer complaints, don’t justify your (or your employee’s) actions or behavior and blame the customer. Badmouthing the customer after you’ve gotten them off the phone might make you feel better, but tell me how it is going to grow your business? Fix the situation!

5) Don’t be passive.  Don’t be passive aggressive.

6) Have zero tolerance on negativity. Negativity begets more negativity and then motivation sinks. Lead by example. People complain about it being Monday? Get them enthused with a team breakfast before you open doors. They feel overwhelmed? Ask them how you can help them, where things can be delegated, where time is being wasted, etc. You set the atmosphere and that atmosphere is what determines sales and success.

7) Learn to delegate. You are not as great or as irreplaceable as you think, and yes, with proper training, some of your tasks can be delegated to your team members. If you still think they can’t do it after training, time to get new team members! Still don’t want to delegate smaller tasks? Is it because you don’t want to concentrate on the harder, bigger issues?

8) Your business is only as good as your employees and your management skills. Period.

9) If a team or a project or a business is sinking, it is the manager’s fault. If you, as manager, still blame the team, who’s responsibility was it to deal with your team before it was too late?

10) Don’t let employees determine the quality of your service. Lead by example. Have the courage to correct your employees. If you set the example of not making excuses, they will follow in your foot steps.

(photo © 2008 Frank Kovalchek | via: Wylio.com)

These things are a direct reflection on yourself and your business. Your business values aren’t what is written in a dusty business plan or on a plaque on your wall – it is how you run your business every single day.   The next 10 tips are listed in the following blog article; Keep reading!

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photo © 2011 Sean MacEntee | more info (via: Wylio)In the previous blog post on Banning Social Media At Work, we identified why banning is not a solution.  Now, let’s look at alternatives to banning. If Social Media can help your company, business, gym, law firm, non-profit (getting my drift?) to get new clients, why would you ban it completely? People will always find a way to socialize during work hours. Remember, it is not the tools that are the problem. Instead, formulate a social media policy that outlines which sites are OK to access and for how long and for what reasons.

Your tech-savvy team members can also help you monitor what is being said online about your company, your industry, and your competitors; thus helping your sales. Because selling is simply about listening and relationships. Sites like LinkedIn and Twitter and Blogs do that – they help build relationships and help you listen. Let these employees become online ambassadors for your business. Your people already represent your brand-  give them the tools to do so online as well. As Stop Blocking suggests, these active employees can “increase online business literacy for the rest of your employees.”

It is important that companies understand that the key is in measuring productivity, and not face-time in the office. If I happen to read Wikipedia or Facebook for 15 minutes to rest my brain, and still make my sales quota or my marketing deadlines, aren’t I more valuable than a person who leaves the web surfing for home, but doesn’t come close to my productivity results? And then there is the issue with allowing some people taking regular cigarette breaks while expecting the non-smoker to work without the breaks.

So rather than banning Social Media, build a Social Media plan and define guidelines for your employees. Teach them how and when to use the tools effectively and in ways to help your business.

IBM is an example of a company that benefited greatly from pushing to become a “social business”. According to Brand Media Strategy, “IBM has over 30,000 employees on Twitter, over 200,000 on Facebook, over 200,000 on LinkedIn and over 35,000 bloggers. Add these to internal networks and a 75,000 strong community of ex-IBMers and you’ve got a massive community that creates and shares content with unrivaled speed and agility.”

What do you think of these solutions? Are they a viable alternative for you to blocking things completely?

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photo © 2008 Uwe Hermann | more info (via: Wylio) According to Epicenter, in a 2009 survey of 237 corporate employees by Nucleus Research, 77% of workers who have a Facebook account said they use it during work hours. And of those using Facebook at work, 87% said they had no clear business reason for accessing the network.

Thus, many companies ban Social Media at work… and this ban is as effective as taking aspirin to cure a sunburn. And these companies block Social Media sites (Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, Wikipedia, YouTube, etc.) due to one reason: FEAR. They are afraid that productivity will drop, time will be wasted, or employees will say the wrong thing online. They are also afraid of these sites since they don’t know how to use them or “control” employee-generated content.

You might be right about productivity. And if you are right, don’t you think the issue is with your workforce rather than Facebook or Twitter? Doesn’t this suggest that there is a bigger underlying issue? Understand that taking toys away is not going to solve productivity issues. Are you going to ban the phone because people might make personal calls? Going to ban emails? Going to ban the entire Internet? And good luck with banning texting. See that the tools aren’t the core of the problem?

Banning Social Media also suggest lack of trust from management and micromanagement. It also shows that the company operates a la Flintstone era and it not only doesn’t know how to use these tools, but is afraid of them and just doesn’t “get it”. Furthermore, with most people carrying smart phones that access the internet, isn’t banning the computer a bit like playing ostrich?

Banning social media can also backfire. Even the world power China couldn’t ban it successfully – do you think you really have a chance? Social Media is not a fad, it’s not going away, and banning it completely isn’t going to solve your problems. So what is the solution? We’ll discuss that in tomorrow’s blog article.

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photo © 2010 Coletivo Mambembe | more info (via: Wylio)Cue LinkedIn. The power of LinkedIn isn’t who you know (your 1st degree contacts). The power of LinkedIn is your 2nd degree contacts. And your 3rd degree contacts. Who is it that your contacts know?

You could never call up one of your contacts and ask to look through their rolodex. Cue LinkedIn. With LinkedIn, you not only see their contacts, but you can request to be introduced to the prospect, look through the prospect’s profile, see what conversations they have been engaged in, see who else they know and more.

The 2nd power of LinkedIn is groups. Groups are the gateway to meet like-minded professionals, connect with your peers, lead discussions, get opinions, and connect with other business people in a meaningful way. There are groups for virtually any sector or niche market. Calling on an insurance company? Join the group of agents to see what the current trends and issues are in the industry. Check if the agent you will call on has contributed to any of the discussions and start a conversation with them.

Answering questions in groups will not only start new relationships and establish your expertise, but it can also help you get clients. This was how I got my first international client 6 months after starting my business. I happened to answer one of his questions and we started a dialogue. He researched my other answers and liked what he read. He reached out to me about working together, and I had my first client from Europe.

As with anything else in life, you’ll get out of LinkedIn what you put into it. It’s a great tool for expanding your network, strengthening existing relationships, reducing cold calling, starting meaningful dialogues, and establishing yourself as the expert in your field. How have you used LinkedIn?